Is the Nuclear Family Ideal Family Structure? - Essay Sample

Introduction

Has the concept of living in the extended family outdated? Which family structure best fits modern society?"A father sitting before his morning coffee while mother buttered the toast. [Kids] woke to glasses of fresh orange juice. They hurried through the day making new friends and gobs of money, returning home to a warmly lit living room and then dinner"(22). These are the most common aspects that society relates to a typical nuclear family in the present world. In 1950's most individuals were brought up in a traditional nuclear American family which was composed of "a breadwinner-father and housewife-mother and a couple of kids, maybe a dog and a spacious suburban home."(17) The nuclear family was considered the ideal form of family in the 1950s, but in today's world, there has been a significant transformation in the family structure. The traditional family where both parents lived together with their children is no longer considered as the definition of family. Single parents, divorcees, and many other forms of a family have taken root in society. Today, being in a family is not about belonging to a household composed of children and the two parents but a type of life which goes hand in hand with choice and preference of the individual as influenced by their lifestyles.

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It was my routine to go and visit my grandparent each Sunday. As a Sunday routine, I went to visit my grandparents to have a good time with them as usual and also assist them in doing a few chores in the home. During the Sunday visit I opened the door, and as I entered the house, I was greeted by emptiness and silence which indicated that human beings were no longer living there. It felt stupid finding myself in such a situation. I forgot that my grandparents pass away few weeks ago. Based on my Asian background, it is wrong to take parents to a senior or nursing home since children are supposed to take care of their elderly parents. Relating closely with only members of the nuclear family is not a common practice in Chinese society. Traditional Chinese culture prefers big family. That one has to relate not only with the nuclear family but also members of the extended family as well. My parent also liked big family but base on my home condition we cannot afford to take care of my grandparents. For this reason, my grandparent decided to go to a senior home a few years ago. The decision to go to this facility was motivated by the feeling they did not want to stress their child with the pain of taking care of them as a way of appreciating efforts made by the grandparent in bringing my parent up.

The current generation of Chinese prefers to take their elderly parents to a senior or nursing home because nuclear family is they feel that the nuclear family is the ideal type of family one should keep in the current world. There are about three reasons as to why people prefer to do it. First, they believe that these facilities provide better care for their elderly parents. Having a family to fend for, older children often find little time to balance with their daily routines with caring for their elderly parents. Secondly, most people prefer to live with their nuclear family opposed to living with the extended family which is always large than they desire. Thirdly, some older adults prefer to be in the senior homes since they do not want to stress their children concerning taking care of them and therefore, they can decide to go by themselves to the facilities. In other words, some elderly parents feel that staying in the homes of their children creates unnecessary burden which can be avoided by going to a nursing home.

I believe that living in a senior home is not the best option since the elderly face various challenges in these homes. For instance, seniors witness their counterparts passing on which is a situation that causes them to feel that they are the next on the line to face death. Witnessing fellow residents dying can make abandoned and hopeless. Elderly persons require greater attention compared to other age groups due to their old age, illnesses or disability. Dealing with these conditions requires compassion and love which may not automatically be available at the nursing home

Many Asians believe that taking their parents to the best nursing homes would ensure that they are receiving the best care. However, it is difficult for most people to afford to take their elderly parents to the best nursing homes since they are expensive. It could be better if children of elderly parents have enough money to leave the elderly to stay at home and avail professional day care services. This problem mostly affects the middle class since the rich cannot take their elderly parents to nursing homes because they can afford to build one for themselves. On the other hand, the poor cannot afford the services of a nursing home.

Living with elderly parents has repercussions since conflicts can result causing disharmony in the home environment. On the other hand, taking elderly parents to nursing homes also has some consequences. For instance, there is a risk of losing the elderly while they are in nursing homes which can cause a lot of regrets. There is a traditional Chinese word "Xiao"(filial piety), it means to return the favor to the parents This " Xiao" word contain another character means "child." Parents need their children to take care of them. There is a deeper meaning in this word. It is made of myriad regrets. We don't want to cause the regrets in the future. Therefore, we should not abandon our own traditional form of family. However, people might argue that some older adults choose to live in nursing homes to keep their personal lives away from their children. The truth is that the current generation does not know how to have their personal life because they live in a communist society. Communist society only teaches them how to work for the country. My parents have made a lot of sacrifices for their children, and it is the role of children to take care of their parents when they are weak, sickly and old. I believe that children should take care of their parents when they are old since they will require the same help when they reach that age. Therefore, the ideal type of family is not the nuclear family which contains a father, mother, and child.