Observation on the Level of Communication Between Parents and Children

Paper Type:  Essay
Pages:  8
Wordcount:  1969 Words
Date:  2021-05-27

The first observation took place in a park. The family that took my interest consisted of a young mother, possibly between the age of twenty-three and twenty-seven. She appeared to be engrossed in her phone despite being on the playground with her child. The child was possibly three years old as per his articulation of words. His sentences were clear when he spoke and quite familiar with the things that he played with. He also appeared to be social as he would play and interact with the other children without any challenge. Hutchinson puts into perspective Eriksons notion that at this age of development, children tend to communicate more with their peers and initiate talks or games; experiences that allow them to develop interpersonal skills and fit in various groups (Hutchinson , 2014). Also, by undertaking activities and interacting with peers at ease, then they can develop aspects such as making good decisions and being leaders (Hutchinson, 2014).

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The child keeps on playing with the other children and appears to have fun. However, when he accidentally falls, his mother heads towards him and lashes on him for being careless. The boy keeps quiet and takes a seat at the furthest end of a slide. The mother resumes her seat on a bench, where she had sat before and continued scrolling through her phone. The boy sits alone for some time despite various advances from his peers to join them in their games. Erikson attributes the boys behavior to guilt that is associated with their prior actions. Erikson explains that when the initiative construct of children at this stage is critiqued, they tend to feel guilty such that lay back for a while. The child takes initiatives which the parents will often try to stop to protect the child. The child will often overstep the mark in his forcefulness, and the danger is that the parents will tend to punish the child and restrict his initiatives too much (Schultz & Schultz, 2016). Therefore, the child not taking part in the games anymore indicates the feeling of guilt after his mothers warning. The child develops self-doubt such that he or she begins to become cautious with the activities that he or she engages in. The mothers behavior was quite subtle as she did not give the child the expected attention but rather communicated with him when something was wrong. Eventually, the boy went back to playing after noticing that his mother was not giving him the expected attention. When playing a game of handball with the rest, a game that he had initiated, he kept on staring at his mother with the look that suggested that he wanted his mother to look at him and be proud of how good he was. After several attempts, he stops looking at his mother and pours all attention to the game. After a while, the mother is joined by a female acquaintance such that they engage in plenty of talks and spends quite some time not paying even slight attention to the child. It may be perceived that the mother was influenced by a factor that made her pay less attention to the child when compared to the other mothers who were in constant watch of their children and also joining some of the games that their children engaged in.

Observation 2

The next observation took place during a farmers market where plenty of families had come to purchase what was present. The family that caught my interest was an African American family that consisted of a father and two children, a boy and a girl that appeared to be between the ages of seven and ten. The children followed their father wherever he went and kept quiet for the most of their time in the farmers market. The possible reason for the silence might have been the authoritarian parenting that involves a child being disciplined such that he or she acquires good behavior out of fear and not self-will. Such level of parenting is efficient when it comes to controlling the behavior of children. However, because of lack of self-will, inculcating the behavior to a child on the societal norms becomes difficult and hence may develop behavioral problems when growing up. According to experts on child development, authoritative parents are role models to their children as they exhibit the same behavior that they expect from their children. The perspective is for the children to exercise good behavior adequately. Most parents tend to put up rules for the children to comprehend what is expected of them. The parents tend to manage their emotions well such that through observation, children act in the same way too. Furthermore, they allow children to move independently such that the children learn how to do things on their own which in return leads to confidence (Chambers, 2015).

I noticed that the boy kept looking at the horses and the children that rode on them. It was quite clear that he wanted to climb one but was afraid to ask. For the girl, she kept on observing what her father was dong; mindless of the activities that were taking place in the market. It can be perceived that the girl was afraid of his father due to fear and the aspect of gender placement in the society. The issue of gender differences tends to be relative whereby girls are expected to behave in a particular manner and also boys. In a more practical perspective, some communities expect girls to be conservative and well-composed as a way of showing discipline. However, boys tend to be freer as they can behave as they deem fit such that the behavior will be perceived as normal (Hutchinson, 2014).

The boy requested his father if he would ride one of the horses that were charging $ 2 per ride. The father agrees to his request with the condition that he would ride the horse with his sister. Both children smiled when their father acted on their interests rather than restricting them and hence aligning with the perspective that authoritative parents, despite being lenient, accord their children what they need. In other words, the social construct that the children were brought up in affected how they related to their parents and with each other. Authoritative parenthood is perceived to be the most efficient style of parenting when it comes to maintaining the childrens discipline. Children with such parents grow up as per the expectations of the society. Furthermore, the children grow up knowing how to be independent and in control of their emotions and other personal issues (Chambers, 2015). From the way that the parent communicated with his children, one could tell that he enjoyed spending time with them. Apart from the horse riding, he allowed them to take by the pleasantries that were being sold in addition to carrying whatever the children had bought. The language used was also friendly without any form of strictness or abuse.

Observation 3

The third observation took place on a train. The individuals that caught my interest were a mother and her daughter whom I could easily tell with their nature of communication and the similarity. The family was Caucasian. I estimated the age of the mother to be between thirty-five and forty years old while the daughter was in her adolescents. The girl was busy with her phone while the mother was trying to make conversation with her. The only responses that she was obtaining from her include yes yeah and maybe. According to Eriksons developmental theory, adolescents experience the identity versus role confusion stage. In this stage, teenagers are on the verge of discovering themselves in regards to their personality by analyzing their values, life goals and also beliefs. Most of the teenagers tend to rebel through their journey of fitting whereby they feel that they know better than the rest. They tend to feign conversations from adults and prefer spending more time with their peers due to the similar growth experiences (Schultz & Schultz, 2016). Furthermore, others rebel as a coping mechanism for their growth as they feel out of place and uncomfortable with the changes taking place in their bodies. It is at this stage that adolescents try different things regarding communication, fashion, language, and other aspects that make them feel comfortable. It is worth noting that technology tends to be among the current issues affecting the interaction between parents and the children (Schultz & Schultz, 2016). The fact that the mother was trying hard to create a conversation with her daughter while the girl was busy using her phone indicates that there is a problem in regards to technology. Communication is an important process when it comes to building and maintaining a positive parent to child relationship. Therefore, any barrier makes it difficult for a parent to comprehend what his or her child is going through in addition to making a child find it difficult to express themselves. Most adolescents find it easier telling their peers about issues that are affecting them and possibly that is why they spend most of their time on the phone than engaging in actual conversation with their parents or guardians (Schultz & Schultz, 2016).

Reflection

The language used in all observations was English but differed regarding context. In the first observation, the language setting involved a lady and her son. The level of communication was low as the mother was busy on her phone and not paying keen attention to her child. Furthermore, she later engaged in a conversation with a friend such that she failed to notice her sons desperate need for attention. The only time that she paid attention to him was when he accidentally fell whereby the mother scolded him instead of empathizing with him. Erikson perceives that when children who are three years old experience guilt, they tend to fear to show any initiation with the perspective that they will infuriate their parents. The guilt is what explains the childs withdrawal from playing with his friends after being scolded. The relationship between the two implies that there is an issue hindering the mother from paying attention to her child; maybe work which makes be on her phone rather than paying attention to her child. In the second observation, the language context was a bit authoritative but full of compromise. The father understood the needs of his children while the children approached him in a disciplined manner. As stated earlier, such type of parenting is perceived to be effective as children acquire discipline and abide by the social norms. The language context in the third observation was a bit void whereby the mother was trying hard to seek to have a conversation with her daughter who appeared to focus on her phone while muttering single words fully; terms such as yeah, okay and maybe. The first and the third observations involved Caucasian families while the second family belonged to the African American community. There was no much difference in language in regards to the ethnic differences but rather in the context in regards to the connection between children and their parents.

In regards to the environment, the nature of the circumstances in the observations appeared to influence the type of interaction among the families. In the first observation, the mother was preoccupied with her phone and her friend who joined her later such that there were destructions that occupied the time she would have used in spending time with her son. Such barriers when they are experienced over time tend to affect children when it comes to associating with their parents. In the second observation, it was quite difficult to tell the influence of the environment in regards to the relation between the parent and his children due to his authoritative nature and the rapport that existed between them. In the third observation, the aspect in the environment that inter...

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Observation on the Level of Communication Between Parents and Children. (2021, May 27). Retrieved from https://midtermguru.com/essays/observation-on-the-level-of-communication-between-parents-and-children

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