I like to live my life drama free, helps keep the stress down. So when Im speaking with her I know I have to think things through before they come out of my mouth. I think by being able to manage our feelings and emotions will help us become better listeners and communicators in the long run. You have to be keeping your emotions in check because certain things are not appropriate for certain matters. For me its when someone has passed away, thats one thing I never know what to say to that person, even when its a family member. I have had grandparents and friends pass away and I just don't like to show my emotions when it comes to that in public. I grieve on my own and cope that way, for me its the easiest way.
But I never really know who to comfort someone that is going through that. So if you dont really know what to say, don't say anything, if its someone you have known for a long time they understand that maybe you are uncomfortable with the situation and they understand you care. But I have had some people that I have known that want you to say the right thing at that very moment, and this has happened to me and I have had to just walk away. They weren't happy with me but I was uncomfortable and wasnt sure what to say and the consequences to that was they didnt speak with me for a few weeks. After explaining to that person Iwasnt sure what to say and didn't want to say the wrong thing thats why I walked away and then they understood. I look back now and think I should have just told them how I felt then and then there wouldnthave been repercussions afterwards. I was never really taught to talk about my feelings, so I was very use to keeping them to myself, and not letting my stress out until it was too much to handle then I would explode. By doing this you are letting out days, weeks or even months of emotions out all at once that may not even be relevant to the situation you are in at that current moment. I have had to learn on my own that not hiding my emotions and talking out things with a friend or my husband has helped me in a big way. I have a very low stress level now and don't let things bother me as much as they use to. I think by being open and honest can help manage your emotions; you arent keeping whatyouare thinking and want to say inside. For me when interacting with my family they already know who I am, and how I act. I don't have to hide from them. I can tell them anything and they listen and give me advice if I need it. I am a great listener in my family and my sisters call me all the time for advice, which is kind of funny to me because Im the baby of the family but seem to have more experience in things then they do. Being able to adapt your emotions to the situation for me helps because if its a happy time and Im stressed about something I will talk with my husband first and figure it out before going to a get together or party and pretending to be happy when really Im not, and my family can usually tell. For me its just easy to know whats appropriate at the right times. I don't try and be rude thats not how I am, but I do know when my husband and I are around people we dont know well it can be hard because he has a type of personality that where you don't always know if he is kidding of joking around and you may take him seriously when he means no harm.
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